"What About Your Friends?"
The older I get, the more I understand #TLC's song, "What About Your Friends?" Now of course, there is the factor that many friendships last for a season while others may last a lifetime. The problem is many of us are so quick to cut people off and/or end friendships over small disputes we forget the value of friendships. Because I've lived in multiple cities, I created relationships with many. Not all of them have sustained value over time but there are some that I truly value and consider those people distant family members. For discussion purposes, I won't name all the names to avoid offending anyone but would name the type of friendship that you could easily relate to. Some relationships could be toxic where we learn lessons and others could be beneficial where we understand another's perspective because of their race, culture, nationality and/or upbringing.
The Ambitious Friend: I love to surround myself around those that are doing better that I am. Not only do they motivate me to do better but they give me hope that anything is possible with ambition and determination. These are usually all of my friends. They all strive to want more in life and will not stop until they have reached their goal. It is important to have friends like these. I heard in passing that if you are doing the best in your circle, you need new friends. I strongly agree because at that point, you become complacent because your friends need to catch up to you and you feel that you have reached the highest point. If my friends cannot inspire each other to want more then they are no friend of mines.
The Travel Friend: At this stage of my life, there is nothing I love to do more than travel. Of course, I would love to travel the world with all my friends but there are some that you cannot take each and everywhere. I usually travel with the same 2-3 people. I never have to question their reliability, if they have their money and most importantly our vibes match. I am all for fun and games but I would rather not come back to the room and my girl has a random man in the room. Nah baby girl, you are trippinggggg.
The Party Friend: This friend understands my VIBE. She's not my babysitter and I am not hers. I used to always hear the DJs yelling over the mic for ladies to "organize their crew". Bwoy, did I find out this is a REAL THING. Each friend has a certain value and trust me, you cannot invite everyone out. Or at least, you have to know which friend to invite to certain parties. Now if they are diverse/cultured and could do a ratchet and a soca party then you lucked up. I rather not take my friend that only listens to reggaeton to an 90's R&B party or my fete'n partner to a professional networking event if they've never worked a 9 to 5. It all sounds like common sense but bringing a hip-hop fan to a #SSS (Secret Soca Society) party is not a good idea. *Rolls eyes*
The Broke Friend: We've all been the broke friend in a circle or two. There are no judgments here, but trust and believe this friend rarely gets an invitation from me to go anywhere but I cannot front our conversations be official though! :)
The Dearest Friend: This friend is one of my dearest friends. This person as she reads this would know for a fact I am talking about her. We met in college and today, I consider her one of my girls. Back then, she thought my personality was a bit harsh and that I was too blunt for her. I'm not sure where she got that from but whelp, we're here. Oddly, we didn't get close until our senior year. Our personalities are somewhat similar but I never had more than two words for her throughout college. That all changed during graduation week. Could you believe she was the only one to ask me to hangout for graduation festivities? We weren't even all that cool. Surprisingly, we automatically clicked. I see a lot in her that I see in my older sister. Talking to her makes me feel at home. She tells me what I need to hear and checks me when I feel the need to be the villain/toxic person in someone else's life. Oh, you guessed it - *waves* hey Wade!
The Girl From Church: I'm just going to name this lovely lady friend of mine - Dominique. I'm almost sure I met Dominique when I was about 12 at Morning Star Baptist Church in Boston. I am strong believer in zodiac signs so trust me when I say every characteristic you could think of for a #Leo, she embodies it. But all jokes aside, I never had a friend that I could count on more to spiritually center and remind me of the real-life topics that friends sometimes brush under the rug. I know I can call Dominique right now and talk to her without any filter and she'll ask, "well what do you want out of this situation?" Of course, she also has a physiology background so I also get therapeutic sessions for the free. Seriously, this in my girl. We could talk about goals, sex, religion and mental health all in 30 minutes. I have very few friends that we could send sermons to one another and followup with notes.
The Friend That's Been Through Some Shit: Now half of friends could fit into this bucket. See, I started "dating" very late in the game so outside of #TeamKennedy, they have to listen to these crazy stories some men have put me through. Could you imagine me calling you at 3 am to talk about a dude that played me and all the signs were there. Yup, they could because they know. We've all been there, but my girls would let me vent and we all agreed that some of these nigG@$ ain't sh!t. It's funny now but I definitely was not laughing then. Okuuuurrr!?
Bottom line is that I have a variety of friends and each serves a certain purposes. Nonetheless, they are all there for me in some capacity. For that I appreciate each and every one of them. Love ya'll!
Quick question: Which friend are you?